Sunday, March 3, 2013

Mercury Retrograde Week 1 ~ I Survived... barely

Week 1 of the first Mercury Retrograde of 2013 has been more than many people can bear. Too many emotional upheavals, unexpected death and more than a few electronic malfunctions. I for one will be more than happy when March 17th comes and this cycle is over.

Up until this cycle I had begun to be able to work through the things that *triggered* my emotional break down. I had figured out how to ground and recharge so I could deal with the fall out. Not this time. This time, no matter what I did, I could not get a handle on my emotions, nor did I have the ability to help those around me cope with the things they were experiencing. This past week I have seen more emotional roller coaster rides from not only the people close to me, but from people I have never met or even had a conversation with.

This past Saturday or day one of Mercury Retrograde, I spent a good deal of time in the Craft room, meditating, grounding and preparing for what ever may come. I felt pretty good, so I decided I'd do some sewing and see if I could get some more Tarot bags ready for Aoibheal's Attic. Needless to say that was a complete waste of time and energy. I didn't even make it through one bag before I had to stop and completely rip apart the seams I'd just sewn. After trying once again and failing, I put the fabric back in the tote and walked away, and I haven't gone back to it yet.

Monday I woke to the heartbreaking news that Madison was in a coma, on a ventilator and had been diagnosed with end stage leukemia  This happened so quickly, no one was aware she was sick and no one was even a little bit prepared for the devastation this brought to so many people. If you are lost as to what I'm speaking of please refer to the previous posts here in the blog. I honestly cannot write about it again. By Wednesday Maddie was declared brain dead and taken off life support, thus throwing those who loved her into the deepest pits of sadness and mourning. This is one of the most horrific events I've ever had to be part of. Even though I did not know either Madison or her mother in the real world, their pain and suffering hurt more people than you can imagine... for days, my heart actually hurt.

Then on Friday, our dear Magaly from Pagan Culture unexpectedly lost her little brother as well. Already this year there has been more loss and sorrow than I can remember ever happening in such a rapid succession.

I fully believe the year 2013 will be the one to challenge everyone in a multitude of ways, and you can either give in and be swallowed up by the things happening around you or you can buck up, take the power back and OWN 2013 for yourself and those around you. I admit, I'm pretty worn out already and it's only March 3rd. But with Spring only 17 days away, I am praying better weather, sunny skies and warmer temperatures will chase the doldrums away and bring out the energy we all know is hiding under those blankets we've been reluctant to release just yet.

If you are feeling a bit over whelmed, overly emotional, or wanting to hide for a bit longer like that crazy ground hog has been doing, please know you are not alone. Many people, myself included have found sanctuary in our blankets, hiding in the dimness, waiting for the sun to finally show her face. She's coming...just a few more days! For the next 17 days until Spring has sprung, know that I'm sending you lots of love and hugs.

5 comments:

  1. I am one of those that just wants to hide for a bit. This Retrograde so far has wreaked havoc with my self-esteem, my creative voice and most of all, my depression. I've also had to deal with more people expressing doubt of the veracity my pain/illness. If I hear one more person say I need to "work through it", or "that's not a real disease, you're just being lazy", or that "you can't be in pain all of the time. Get up and get more exercise", I swear I may explode. I have never wanted to hide in a hole or cry so much as I have with this Retrograde.

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    1. I'm not sure who has been questioning you and your illness, but I for one think they just need to shut the fuck up. They don't live in your body and they have NO idea what you are going through. Please, by all means...EXPLODE! those you unload on more than deserve everything they get.

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  2. Retrograde never really gets to me as much as it does some people. Sure, I have annoyances and miscommunications, but I'm never an emotional wreck. What a relief. Another reason why I'm glad I'm not an empath!

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    1. Yeah, being an empath certainly has it's drawbacks. The farther down this road I travel, the more I learn. It is challenging at times and other's I wouldn't give it up for any thing in the world. Retrograde has recently begun affecting Jimmy in a more pronounced manner...

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