Do you tend to make friends easily?
This was a question on a pre employment questionnaire I recently completed
My answer was: No.
I suppose I should clarify and expand that, but it really comes down to just that. I'm not saying I don't have friends. I'm not saying I don't want or appreciate them, but it doesn't come easy. A lot of people are put off by my occupations, or former occupations. Not that I care about their opinions, but it does make that first hurdle of friendly acquaintances harder to get over. I'm naturally suspicious. I learned early that giving trust easily is an unwise move, and when even your best friend betrays that trust, it makes it harder to trust again.
I always feel like I'm living on the edge, and I've learned that the only person I can completely depend on is me. I may learn to trust others, to a certain extent, but that knowledge is always there and it makes the friendship making process more difficult.
I'm prickly, or so I've been told. I'm opinionated. I'm quick to solve a dispute in violence, and have few qualms about violence. None of this lends itself well to making friends. It makes people wary, and rightfully so. Of course, I'm wary of them as well. So we circle each other warily and keep from reaching out for a long time.
I have friends. There are people willing to see past that, willing to be patient until I trust them. But not too many, and it is never easy. It works for me.